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Dear Greg, Tina, Justin, Alyssa: I was glad to see a literary essay show up in our case presentations, because we often don't get to view this popular form in high school English. Your question about voice goes right to the point of this writer. The essay sounds like a natural voice trying to get out of a cage of essay conventions, starting with the thesis statement. Because the thesis is only lightly addressed in the essay, I suspect it is an assigned thesis, rather than one the student composed. I also suspect some of the vocabulary that jarred us were assigned in connection with reading //The Crucible//. It is a good caution for teachers who think they should require new vocabulary words in student essays. The writer did a commendable job using the words, but they don't quite fit, because they do not say what he wanted to say. The biggest challenge in writing about literature is to make the book relevant to a teenager's experience. We don't expect them to write like New York Times' drama critics, but like teenagers reading a difficult adult play. Awakening the student voice requires reader responses that engage young adults. E.g. Who are the outcasts in //The Crucible//? Why are people treated as outcasts in our school or community? What are some examples of bullying or prejudice against people you know? (no names, please). If the questions are relevant to the teenage experience, the writing will reach that level, the level of intelligent conversation.

Bill